ITEM! So last night the Spider-Phone buzzed and sure enough the caller I.D. was the one I was dreading, Avi Arad. I figured Avi was calling to gloat and arrange to collect on the bet we made over Iron Man’s box office take opening weekend. As you’ll recall from our last webispode, your Uncle Stanley bet Avi that Iron Man would break the opening weekend records of Spider-Man 3 and Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest, taking in $140 million plus. Loser agreed to have Spider-Man’s costume body-painted on his nude body and parade up and down Sunset & Vine. What was I thinking? And even though the Golden Avenger gratuitously garnered the second biggest opening weekend of any non-sequel movie, and placed 10th overall, it’s $104.2 million take didn’t quite put it over the absolute top. Everyone at the studio was celebrating last night except Yours Truly because I had this stupid old-man bet hanging over my humbly harangued head.
But I decided to suck it up and take the call anyway, only to find out it’s Avi calling to concede the bet! Seems he only remembered betting that Iron Man wouldn’t take in over $140 mil period. Since it took in $104.2 million domestically plus a whopping $96.8 million foreign, that put the total opening weekend at $201 million! You can buy yourself a lotta Repulsor Rays with that much mullah, pilgrims! So Avi conceded the bet and shamefully, Ol’ Smiley let him! This morning at dawn I sent Irving Forbush out with a digital camera to meet the Avaricious One down in Hollywood. Technically they were at the McDonalds on Sunset a little ways down from Vine, but your Uncle Stanley isn’t gonna quibble. Actually... now that I think about it... I more-than-suspect that Avi knew he won the bet and he chose to concede anyway, just so he could go web-swinging in public the whole way, if you know what I mean. Who knows with these Hollywood types. Anyhoo, a win is a win! Enjoy the only PG-13 shot that Honest Irv came back with! ‘Nuff Said!
Excelsior!
Smiley
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