ITEM! Hey there Intrawebites! Can’t get enough of ol’ Greenskin? Got $3,100 burning a hole in your 401k plan? Desperately in need of over eight feet of fiberglass guaranteed to prevent you from dating ever again? Then it’s Mercenary Marvel to the rescue! In a desperate move to recoup as mucho dinero from their $150 million investment in The Incredible Hulk movie as humanly possible, the studio is auctioning off a pack of these promethean promotional productions on the ebays. See here.
Whatever happened to promoting your movies by giving away promotional items in a contest? That’s how Uncle Marty used to do it, that’s how Marvel used to do it, and it’s worked out pretty well so far. I can just hear the boardroom discussion about this now. “Hell, our fan-base is a bunch of man-babies with more money than sense anyway... let’s see if we can squeeze even more radioactive blood from the turnip!”
Not so much as it turns out. Most of the “buy it now” ebay auctions are going unbid upon. I guess your Uncle Stanley and his prehistoric promotional philosophy are pretty prescient after all. Still, if you absolutely gotta have one of these statuesque stand-ups in your den or living room, and you want to avoid having the Lowell, Massachusetts police knocking at your door, you may want to plunk down $3k for one. Tell ‘em Smiley sent yah!